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Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

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Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  justin85 on Fri 9 Jan 2009 - 21:03

yes this thread is an absolute 100% pure spam crap. this forum needs more spices and posts.

pretty girls peektures can only make me drool for that long then it gets a bit boring =\


Last edited by justin85 on Wed 11 Feb 2009 - 20:27; edited 2 times in total
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  lock90 on Fri 9 Jan 2009 - 22:33

huhu ~ im totally agree wif u =x pirat
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  Ryuji on Fri 9 Jan 2009 - 22:54

so then, pls post your first crap in =) haha! or u wan me to post a couple of them~ that will be quite lame and funny though~
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  Ryuji on Fri 9 Jan 2009 - 23:10

For safety purposes, I AM NOT responsible on teaching young kids vulgar words as there are some vulgar words in these jokes. Have a nice day.

(1) Three kids come down to the kitchen and sit around the breakfast table. The mother asks the oldest boy what he’d like to eat. "I’ll have some fuckin’ French toast," he says. The mother is outraged at his language, hits him, and sends him upstairs. She asks the middle child what he wants. "Well, I guess that leaves more fuckin’ French toast for me," he says. She is livid, smacks him, and sends him away. Finally she asks the youngest son what he wants for breakfast. "I don’t know," he says meekly, "but I definitely don’t want the fuckin’ French toast."


(2) Last night I went to a 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, "Hey, the sign says you're open 24 hours." He goes: "Not in a row!"


(3) Saul is working in his store when he hears a booming voice from above: "Saul, sell your business." He ignores it. It goes on for days. "Saul, sell your business for $3 million." After weeks of this, he relents, sells his store. The voice says ‘Saul, go to Las Vegas." He asks why. "Saul, take the $3 million to Las Vegas."
He obeys, goes to a casino. Voice says, "Saul , go to the blackjack table and put it down all on one hand." He hesitates but knows he must. He’s dealt an 18. The dealer has a six showing. "Saul, take a card." What? The dealer has -- "Take a card!" He tells the dealer to hit him. Saul gets an ace. Nineteen. He breathes easy. "Saul, take another card." What? "TAKE ANOTHER CARD!" He asks for another card. It’s another ace. He has twenty. "Saul, take another card," the voice commands. I have twenty! Saul shouts. "TAKE ANOTHER CARD!!" booms the voice. Hit me,Saul says. He gets another ace. Twenty one. The booming voice goes: "un-fucking-believable!"

(4) My grandfather always said, "Don't watch your money; watch your health." So one day while I was watching my health, someone stole my money. It was my grandfather.


(5) Two guys are walking down the street when a mugger approaches them and demands their money. They both grudgingly pull out their wallets and begin taking out their cash. Just then one guy turns to the other and hands him a bill. "Here’s that $20 I owe you," he says


(6) Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy says "I’m lonely. I wish my friends were back here." lol!

(7) Two old ladies are in a restaurant. One complains, "You know, the food here is just terrible." The other shakes her head and adds, "And such small portions."
*Basically if you dont get it, it means that the first lady already says it tasted terrible, and the second lady still complin its still small portion, such an idiot, asking a big portion of shity food~ haha!*

( 8 ) I failed my driver’s test. The guy asked me "what do you do at a red light?" I said, I don’t know… look around, listen to the radio…

(9) My wife and I took out life insurance policies on each other -- so now it's just a waiting game.

(10) A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can. Three years later, there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says ‘What the hell was that all about?" lol!

(11) I was coming back from Canada, driving through Customs, and the guy asked "Do you have any firearms with you?" I said: "What do you need?


Most of the jokes are really "zha dao"~ haha~
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  justin85 on Fri 9 Jan 2009 - 23:33

lol! x 10 times for the jokes...more random items pls!

peektures,jokes,news, anything la =x
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  ahyang89 on Sat 10 Jan 2009 - 0:55

panjangnya malas wan read
Post baby face pic

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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  lock90 on Sat 10 Jan 2009 - 21:13

-_- dun tor ngor lok sui !
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  ahyang89 on Sat 10 Jan 2009 - 21:29

bila ang minat bang bang tang de?
LOL

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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  Ryuji on Sat 10 Jan 2009 - 22:42

why suddenly say i minat bang bang tang?
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  lock90 on Sat 10 Jan 2009 - 22:47

yalo funny,why u say ryuji minat bang2 tang? Question

:craps:
I think that I'm a chicken..(lame joke)

Panda Psychiatrist: What's your problem?

Patient: I think I'm a chicken.

Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on?

Patient: Ever since I was an egg!


Last edited by lock90 on Sat 10 Jan 2009 - 22:50; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  ahyang89 on Sat 10 Jan 2009 - 22:48

cos ang avatar is bang bang tang background? n that is wang zi?
lol

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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  Ryuji on Sat 10 Jan 2009 - 22:57

yes mehs?
i think no narhs~ ini picture is my fren worhs @_@!!
he ngam ngam upload ini new picture in frenster arh @_@!!
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  ahyang89 on Sat 10 Jan 2009 - 22:59

aiya bang bang tang la tu
watch till sien liao

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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  Ryuji on Sat 10 Jan 2009 - 23:01

ooo.. cheh~ i thought is him lai de tim.. mana ada malaysian so yeng zai de.. ish ish~ i wan find new picture upload d.. ngek ngek~
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  ahyang89 on Sat 10 Jan 2009 - 23:34

use ur own pic la
paling yeng in malaysia
L O L

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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  justin85 on Sun 11 Jan 2009 - 0:44

agree!

real peekture pl0x!
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  ace on Sun 11 Jan 2009 - 10:46


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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  lock90 on Sun 11 Jan 2009 - 13:19

lols that power ranger is so...


p/s: yay ryuji! upload ur pic as disply pickture ^^
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  justin85 on Sun 11 Jan 2009 - 15:42

ace wrote:
kns u..tiba2 call out powder ranger pulak =.=


Last edited by justin85 on Sun 11 Jan 2009 - 21:47; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  ace on Sun 11 Jan 2009 - 17:27

Sorry kids barney and frens got pwned


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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  Ryuji on Sun 11 Jan 2009 - 18:57

ZOMGWTFBBQ!! Once I see itu barney picture, i got this weird feeling =_=!! Dont dare to see, kinda horror ~_~

ahh? my picture? wait after cny la.. i lazy wanna upload it from camera to comp xD
hehe~
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  ace on Sun 11 Jan 2009 - 20:28

Ryuji wrote:ZOMGWTFBBQ!! Once I see itu barney picture, i got this weird feeling =_=!! Dont dare to see, kinda horror ~_~

ahh? my picture? wait after cny la.. i lazy wanna upload it from camera to comp xD
hehe~

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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  justin85 on Sun 11 Jan 2009 - 21:48

very very bad photochopped skills.

-10/10
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  Ryuji on Sun 11 Jan 2009 - 22:11

wahahahahaha!! the grandma so geng! hit until airbag come out! A must watch stupid clip xD


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ZCoIege8oM
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Re: Absolute crap [AHhh fresh meat!]

Post  NaNa on Tue 13 Jan 2009 - 3:21

@.@ damn dat grandma's strong. uhm. here's a vid a fren of mine asked me to watch. i find it kinda funny.

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